First synth, that covers a lot of it, 10 in ownard. lower the effects on the drums at the song goes along.
Either sharpen your vocals to sit in the song better, taking off fx, and at least moving them else where, it sounds like muffled nothing. Sometimes you ahve to eq or sidchange a track to accomidate vocals.
Couse this is how a lot of lofi stuff so if you're satified with overpower vocals that are incohereent,
If you set on going for this super lofi effect, play with it gradually getting worse and being more clean in places, haven't it all rough is just grating. If you're drawing influence from silent here, you're on the write track, but it's not quite there.
Luck for you on bandcamp you can fix songs anytime you want and just replace them.
I'd say try listening to it without the vocals, or takign some elements out so it doesn't sound to busy.
That's just my opinion and my main gripe. If this track is how you want it, just ignore me, I thought it was already, it reminded me of 00' horror survivor stuff, so that's pretty cool you almost nailed that vibe. Nice strong drums. A better mix on the guitar would be nic, there' sjust so much noise bleeding nto other stuff. You have the outlines of something that could be really great.
I've never been a fan of this type of lofi, so excuse my bias please.